Why I skipped the gender reveal and what I focused on instead

photograph of India Jackson and family

When it came to celebrating my baby’s arrival, I knew I wanted to do things a little differently. Instead of making gender the star of the show, I chose to focus on the values I wanted to honor and the feelings I wanted to cultivate—both for myself and for everyone involved.

Here’s how it went down:

• Theme: My baby shower wasn’t pink or blue—it was a joyful mix of yellow and green. I wanted the colors to reflect happiness and growth, not gender norms.

• Registry: Most of the items were gender-neutral. Why support manufactured norms when you can pass along other colors more easily to little ones of the future?

• Guest List: We included people from 1 to 80+ years old, and all gender identities. It was important to create an atmosphere of inclusion and belonging.

• Activities: Instead of the usual (and often awkward) baby shower games, we focused on making sure everyone had a blast. Men who had never been to a shower before told me they had a great time, and the kids didn’t want to leave!

Why did I do it this way? Because I believe in leading by example. It felt right to create an event that aligned with my values, where everyone felt welcomed and loved.

So, here’s a question for you: What would you like to do differently in your next celebration? How can you focus on your values and skip the status quo?

Special shout-outs to Linda & Aubrey Jackson, Erica Courdae, and The Morgan Family. This special event wouldn’t have been possible without you. And to Shannon Collins & E.K. Powell for inspiring me to continue thinking and doing things differently as I entered my first birthing experience. Love you all! 💛

Warmly,
India (she/her)

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